I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize
