she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
