Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
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