i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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