some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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