That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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