I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
