she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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