belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
