The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Randomize