"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
We left an ass print on the piano.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
