it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
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