Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
