I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
