D3 body, D1 cock
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize