you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
