You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Randomize