sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize
