Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
