This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize