That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize