When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
