things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
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