It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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