Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
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