i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
