My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
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