She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize
