when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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