I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
