Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Randomize