question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
