I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Randomize