But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Randomize
