Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
