So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize
