Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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