two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
not ubering you a puppy
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
