so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
