his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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