ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
