Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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