Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
