He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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