Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
