I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
he fucked my hip out of place.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize