She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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