Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
