i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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