he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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